18 - Here We Are

Please bear with me today, I'm feeling more than a little nostalgic. You see my daughter turned 18 today.

Here she was a baby playing in her crib....

I couldn't wait until she started walking and talking

I wanted to show her the whole world

Here she is at 18 months, it was Christmas 1993 and she found Mommys make up!

Fast Forward to age 10, here she is at the Butterfly Pavilion the year it was at Cheyenne Mountain Zoo.

A few years later she turned 13 and we celebrated at Joes Crab Shack

In her Eight Grade Year Tryn decided to try out black hair, its been black ever since.

This is Tryn as a Sophomore at Fountain Fort Carson High School

Tryn at 17, this picture was take during the photo shoot for her engagement photos

Tryn Self Portrait 2010

We have gone from at newborn baby, I can't say tiny because you were 8 lbs 15 oz, but from a helpless newborn to a strong independent woman. You always speak your mind and your passionate and loyal. I am so proud of you Tryn, and I am excited about what the future holds for you.

Mom

Don't get me wrong. Let me start by saying that I appreciate my mom, she has done allot for me and she has accomplished allot in her life. This is not a bashing I hate you post.

This is a I don't understand what is going on here post.

Dear Mom,

You came home from Las Vegas this week, and I didn't know you were coming home - I thought you were coming next month. The first time I saw you this week was my first day off all week and you were disappointed in my house being a disaster and you were incredibly rude to my son in law when he asked you a question. In our own house. The next day we chatted for a few minutes and then I get a phone call asking I got a message when I say no you say too bad and hung up. You yelled at Tryn to take out the trash when you could have just asked her. Then you called and again, thank you for the meds, but I have no idea what message you are talking about and neither did anyone else.



Are you mad because we didn't spend more time together this week? I wish you had called and just asked what my schedule was - its pretty crazy, you arrived on the first day off of my week. I cleaned house and did laundry the next day then went back to work Saturday-Wednesday. I have school 5-11pm on Monday and Wednesday. If we had known you were coming home we could have tried to arrange something.



I don't understand what you have against Tryn and Aaron...I don't understand why you seem so angry.



Love,



Rae Ann

Blogger/Life Envy...

So is it possible to have blogger envy? I know anything is possible - let me describe what I mean. Even though I spend all day on the computer my actual "surfing" time is fairly limited. So once I figured out what Google Reader did I became a huge fan. Now my favorite blogs and I Can Haz Cheezburger come to me! Through other blogs I peak into peoples worlds. It started with remote family and I stumbled on Nie Nie and her family and through my own interests scrapbooks and food sites for cooking, D&D sites and others.

I enjoy these tastes of others worlds and especially in NieNies case I am inspired by them. But a small part of me goes.. "I want". I want my cakes to look like that. I want to be able to pull of those fun clothes. I want my pages to look like that.



The I Want envy demon at it again. Not all I want is bad because it inspires you to try new things and try harder to do things (like making that cake the way I want or cool new pages). The problem comes in if it makes you truly dissatisfied with a good life (see Jon and Kate plus 8!)

The reality is that while there are things that I want to improve about my life - I am working on those. There are things I want to do and the I wants give me idea, but I am happy to live my life and I don't want other peoples lives.

You are not alone

First, if anyone is reading this I apologize for the long pause. Its been a rough patch. Especially the last month has been a roller coaster of highs and lows. Worrying about Aaron-not knowing when the military would finally let him come home. (Resolved happily on October 5 when we picked him up at the Colorado Springs bus terminal), a brief dip into the dating world with a questionable ending. My niece and my father were both baptized into the LDS church.
After my Dads baptism was the priesthood conference and since we were there, we stayed. God has never been shy about reminding me when I need to know something. And He reminded me during the Conference that I am not alone and that I don't need to do everything or anything by myself. Something that is wise to remember and never forget.

A Toe into the Dating World

Okay, so to some people this may seem like a small step, but to me this is huge. I've started chatting with a man that I met on Tagged and responding to posts from another guy on Tagged/MySpace. It is a toe into the dating pool. I know others do this all the time and think nothing of it, but for me - yeah, not so much. Maybe I can make my way out into the dating world!

This is such a odd step for me, Mark and I have been seperated/divorced since what 2002. I have been so focused on Tryn and school, mostly Tryn. Well Tryn is getting her own life and as much as I love her, I know she won't be living at home forever. I need my life too. I'm tired of being lonely. I need to start working my way back out into the world.

Aaron, Tryn and School starting

Aaron had to go back to Florida to wrap up some stuff with the Navy and it looks like it could be anywhere from 2 1/2 weeks to 50 days before he gets to come home. Gotta love the military, really. We will know more in the next few days.

Tryn registars for school tomorrow and gets her laptop back-I can't believe she will be a Junior, makes me feel old, like her being engaged didn't? Her being back in school brings more structure in, it is hard to keep that going during the summer for me.

Still no word on the job yet.